More than 135 million Americans make a trip to the emergency room each year, with almost 40 million coming in as a result of injury. So, it’s safe to say, emergency room staff have many stories to tell, from the hilarious to the heartbreaking, the disturbing to the downright strange (you’d be amazed at how many people seem to come in with objects stuck in places they don’t belong).
We decided to scour the internet to bring you a collection of crazy stories. To keep things family-friendly, we left out the truly upsetting and the wildly inappropriate (don’t worry, they’re just a Google search away if you want to find them).
5 Crazy Stories from the ER
Couldn’t They Have Just Gotten a Dog?
Blatantly disobeying university policy, one fraternity house decided to keep a pet alligator in a large aquarium. Full of liquid courage, one drunken frat boy decided it was a good idea to strip down, get in the tank, and wrestle the gator. Of course, he was no Steve Irwin, and the gator quickly got the best of him and bit him in a “sensitive area.” Embarrassed, the young man tried to take care of the injury himself, but finally came to the ER three days later when the area became infected.
Never Trust a Home-Based Plastic Surgeon
A Rhode Island woman entered an ER with a high fever and red, swollen, and infected buttocks. The story was, she had met a “nurse” in a hardware store who practiced plastic surgery at home, which made it very inexpensive. The woman went home with the “nurse,” and had 2 liters of “hydrogel” injected into each buttock. But the “hydrogel” turned out to be silicone bathroom caulk (no doubt from the hardware store).
Unfortunately, the caulk had become highly integrated into tissue within and around the fat cells, so multiple incisions had to be made into the fat to remove the substance, after which the buttocks “looked like she had been attacked by a bear.” The woman did find her 15 minutes of fame, however, appearing on Tyra, Tyra Banks’ talk show to share her story.
Hooked on Fishing
A Michigan man came into the ER with a hook in his head. Turns out he improperly cast a fishing line, catching his own scalp (and not a single fish). Of course, the scalp bleeds very easily, and a fish hook with its bend, barb, and gap can be very difficult to remove, resulting in profuse bleeding that was difficult to control upon removal. Eventually, doctors got the man hook-free and stitched up, but say this serves as a reminder to leave any foreign objects stuck anywhere on your body in place until you can seek medical treatment as removing it without assistance could cause further damage.
In this case, the man may not have cast off the right way, but he did the right thing by going to the ER instead of trying to de-hook himself.
Staking His Claim
An ER in England was informed that a man whose car had crashed into a wooden fence would be arriving soon. What staff didn’t expect was that he’d be bringing part of the fence with him. A 5-inch wide stake from the fence had impaled the man, entering his body just below the right side of his ribs and exiting out the left shoulder. Surprisingly, the man was wide awake (and probably in shock). “I seem to have a splinter,” he said to ER doctors. “I think that you might need to remove it.” The man spent nearly four weeks in recovery, but lived to tell the tale.
How NOT to Trim the Hedges
A man in his mid-twenties entered an ER with large gashes and lacerations to his upper thighs and dangerously close to his privates. After some prodding, doctors finally got the story: he had been mowing the lawn, and noticed some overgrown hedges. Rather than go get the hedge trimmers, he decided to simply lift up the lawnmower to make some quick cuts. Things didn’t go as planned, and the mower dropped down, slicing him up in the process.
But the story doesn’t end there. Hours later, another man entered the ER with the same injury. “I saw someone trimming their hedges with their mower and thought I’d try it,” he said. Of course, the man he saw was patient number one!
BandGrip for Emergency Room Procedures
All of these stories have one thing in common: BandGrip could have been used to close up the wounds following medical attention. During emergency procedures in a busy ER where every second counts, BandGrip is a non-invasive Micro-Anchor Skin Closure 3.5”x1.5” bandage that is designed for speed and ease of use (it can also be tiled for large incisions or lacerations). In emergency situations, it can be applied quickly to stop blood loss, one of the major causes of mortality in the emergency room.
Learn more about BandGrip here, and if you’re looking for more stories from the ER, check out Untold Stories of the ER on television, airing on TLC, Discovery Life, and Discovery Health Channel (you can also view their best episodes online here!).